SWED life
by s.w.e.d-l.o.v.e
Summary: Bella Swan had a hard life and turned to drugs at a young age. What happens when a sweet, yet mysterious drug dealer sweeps her off her feet? - Deeper than it sounds. :
1. With that flame, I light up the cherry

A/N: Hey there! This is a story based on true events. I really hope you like it, R&R please and thanks.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters or themes, they belong to Stephanie Meyers.

Summary: A/U, Bella has had a hard life, and turned to drugs and alcohol at a young age. What happens when a sweet, but mysterious drug dealer sweeps her off her feet? - Deeper than it sounds.

Warning: This is a strictly M rated story, extreme drug descriptions and sexual scenes inside.

I took a deep breath, and prepared myself to do what I've been doing for the past 2 years of my life. I cleared my thoughts, when all of a sudden my dearest friend Angela looks at me and whispered, "Bella! Hurry up with the bong. It's Jessica's hit." My friends were oh so impatient. See to me, smoking weed is more than just a simple thing. I love the form of smoking weed, it's an art form to me. The spark of the lighter, the filling blast of the smoke, and the satisfying exhale that was sure to come after your pull. It's all what I live for, and I can't imagine my life without it.

Angela and Jessica were both staring at me now, waiting for me to finish my turn with the bong. I grabbed my hot pink Bic lighter, lit the flame, and held the fire into the bowl of my bong. The flame twisted and danced as I smoked the entire bowl of weed, before the marijuana finally pulled through the tube, ending in a loud popping noise as the oxygen refilled the chamber. I held the smoke in my lungs of a few seconds, inhaled twice, then let out a long and thick stream of pot smoke. I felt the high hit me, and all I could think was, 'Damn, this shit isn't that bad'. I handed the bong back to Angela, and watched them load the bowl with fresh weed for Jessica.

My name is Bella. I'm 16 years old, and I have been smoking weed every single day of my life since I was 14. I have been smoking cigarettes since I was 15. I have been getting drunk every weekend since I was 12. But don't think of me as a bad person, because I never planned on my life being like this. Actually, I was anti-drugs for most of my life.

When I was 8, I found out that my older brother Chris started smoking weed. He was 12 at the time, just getting into grade 7. He came home telling my parents that some older boys at the park by our house had forced him to smoke weed, and that he felt scared. Now that I look bad on it, I think he was a wimp. Not only a wimp, but a liar. Chris became a pothead. He got kicked out of the high school I go to when he was 15. My parents were ashamed of Chris. They felt like they were failures as parents, but they saw me as a beacon of hope. I was the good child, the perfect little girl. My mom and I were always closer than close, and I was daddy's little angel. Chris even thought I was the good kid, he told me if I ever smoked weed that he would "kick my ass," you know brothers. He really cared about keeping me pure.

I thought drugs were disgusting, especially weed. When Chris was 16, and I was 12, he started snorting coke. He got addicted, and ended up owing a large coke dealer over a thousand dollars from cocaine. I saw him rip his life apart, and I never wanted that for myself. I believed in god, I went to school, and the thought of cigarettes was just repulsive.

So, how is it I am the way I am now? What happened to make me such a bad kid? It all started the summer of ninth grade, when I was 14. During the summer, my dad Charlie takes me, Chris, and whatever friends we want to come, to our cottage every weekend. This particular summer, I would always bring my best friend Angela. Chris would bring his girlfriend of the week. Every weekend of that summer, Chris, Angela, and I would get really drunk. I was never against drinking, but I never realised how much one bad decision could change your life.

One night, Angela and I started drinking with Chris. By the time we were really wasted, Angela and I decided to take a walk. We walked down to the dock of the cottage, and sat on the edge of the dock looking at the night stars. We gossips, laughed, and just had fun. Randomly, Angela pulled out her pack of smokes. Angela had always smoked cigarettes, but I never thought about smoking them myself. She was just as drunk as me, and offered me a smoke. I thought, hell why not? So I took the smoke and tried it out. It wasn't that horrible, but that might have been because of how drunk I was. Taking that cigarette was the worst choice of my life, because it made so much more of a change in me then I ever thought imaginable.

Ever since I tried that smoke, I had a lot of guilt over it. That, just wasn't me. It was always a dream of mine to be able to say that I had never done drugs, or smoked once in my life. I wanted to be able to say that on my death bed. Now if I said that, I was a liar. It really hit me hard. I told myself it was just a mistake I made when I was drunk, and that it would never happen again. That was until the day my life as I knew it, ended.

July 15th. The day 2 years ago, that I decided to first smoke weed. A few close girlfriends came to me looking for weed. I told them I could get them it, but I didn't smoke weed. They said they just wanted to hang out, and I didn't have to do anything I didn't want to. That was fine with me, so I went to Chris looking for weed for my friends. He was a little suspicious, because if I smoked weed, it would break his heart. But, he gave me the weed that my friends paid for, and I gave it to them.

They took me out to a forest, where they looked confused about what to do. None of them were regulars at smoking weed, and were unsure about where to start. I on one hand, knew exactly how to smoke weed. I had watched Chris do it for years, and I knew all the tricks about weed. I took out the pot, and put it in a paper. I took scissors, and I began to bust up the bud. When it was all evenly grinded up, I loaded the weed into the bowl of my friends' homemade bong, and they started smoking the weed. They kept asking me why I didn't smoke weed, and eventually I ran out of answers to give them.

I thought, what is so great about weed? Why is it people want to smoke this stuff so bad? Is it really worth all the trouble people put themselves through? So, I wanted to try it. The way I saw it, if I liked it enough to continue smoking it, it must be worth it. But if I didn't like it, I would never worry about it again. Just once right? So I smoked the weed. After a while, I was high. I don't know how much it was, because at that point I wasn't too familiar with sizes.

The high, was amazing. All pain in my body was gone, everything I felt stress about in life, had melted away. I finally, understood. Weed really was worth all the trouble, it's amazing. I wanted this feeling forever. The drugs just filled the void in everything wrong with my life. I mean, at this point didn't want to become a stoner. I didn't want to be one of those gross slut girls that hang out with older boys in the back of the school, smoking and doing drugs at school. That seemed too weird to me. But I did, love the drugs.

For the rest of the summer, I got high about once or twice a week. I would hang out with my friends Angela and Jessica, and we would smoke weed a lot. We would laugh, joke, mess around, or sometimes just chill. No matter what, we always had fun when we were high. Soon enough, smoking weed once or twice a week turned into smoking weed every other day.

By the end of the summer, I was an everyday weed smoker. Grade 10 started, and instead of hanging out with my good friends and going to class every day, I hung around the back of the school in the smoker's pit. All my friends were new, and they all smoked weed with me every day. Soon, all my money went to the drug. Along with the drug, I picked up a tobacco addiction. My lunch money, went to weed. On the weekends, I would buy a pack of smokes and more weed.

My name is Bella. I'm 16 years old, and I have been smoking weed every single day of my life since I was 14. I have been smoking cigarettes since I was 15. I have been getting drunk every weekend since I was 12, and this is my life.

SWED life.

A/N: I hope this made sence to everyone! Long and confusing first chapter, I had to include everything from the past so that the present makes sense to you. Basically, ^ this is a true story. It's the story of my life, and I'm mainly writing this because I think it's a good idea to talk about it.

So please read and review. Love it? Let me know. Hate it? Let me know. Want to talk? Private message me. Questions about drugs and/or addictions? Ask me.

PS: For those who don't know what SWED stands for, it means Smoke-Weed-Every-Day. SWED.


	2. I look like yes, and you look like no

A/N: Chapter 2. Out of the story telling, into the present.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters or themes, they belong to Stephanie Meyers.

Summary: A/U, Bella has had a hard life, and turned to drugs and alcohol at a young age. What happens when a sweet, but mysterious drug dealer sweeps her off her feet? - Deeper than it sounds.

Warning: This is a strictly M rated story, extreme drug descriptions and sexual scenes inside.

I looked up from my day dream, and Angela was passing me the bong. I saw Jessica cough, leaning over the grass as she coughed up the usual from her throat. Jessica was the worst person I know for coughing. My bong was green, with a red and yellow flame on the bottom chamber. It reminded me of weed being burnt, so it was my favourite bong. I took it, and lit the bowl of weed. I felt the smoke scratch and tickle my throat as it made it's way to my lungs, it swirled and danced in my lungs before all the weed had fallen through the bong. Again holding in my breath for a few seconds, and inhaling deeply with the smoke in my lungs, I could feel the high already. I let out my air, and the smoke rushed out of my smoke and into the crisp autumn air.

"Bella, how many bowls have you had?" Angela asked me as I cleared the bong and began filling it back up for her hit.

"I don't know, maybe 4?" I answered. At this point, I was high. My body felt light, and my smile was as big as my face would allow. I was Angela check the time on her phone.

"It's already 11:15, we have to be in third period by 11:25. You know that right?" Angela informed me that I needed to go to class every day. Personally, I'm not the biggest fan of class. I don't find it interesting, and I could be doing a lot more in that time.

"You and Jessica go, I'm going to finish the session and walk home." I told her. I skip at least one period, out of the daily four, every day. Though I'm passing with an average of 65%, I miss a lot of school. I had a head-ache anyways, so I just wanted to smoke my weed and head home.

"Bella, are you forgetting our plans tonight? You told me you would go to Edwards party." Angela informed me. Edward was one of Angela's friends, from another school. Though I had never met him, I heard a lot about him. He asked Angela to go to his 18th birthday party tonight, and I told her I would go with her. But now I wasn't feeling much up for it.

"Yeah, I'm really not too sure about going tonight. Can you just go with Jessica?" I suggested, as Jessica picked up her back pack, getting ready to go back to class.

"Jessica is coming too, but I really want you to come. Please Bella? Come to Edwards? He's turning 18. That means there will be a lot of hot older boys at his place, and we all know how much you like the older boys." She said. Well, she really had me on that one. I did have a thing for older boys, and it wouldn't hurt to go to a party and get free weed.

"Yeah, okay, I'll come. But you're driving, I'll be too fucked up tonight to even consider getting behind the wheel." I told her, I figured I could at least try to be responsible. Angela agreed, and she and Jessica walked back toward the school.

I spent the rest of the day smoking weed behind the school. As I had my me time, I really thought about what was going to happen tonight. Angela's older, male friend was having a party. Now could finally be the chance to find the right guy, and forget about the dick-face I dated over the summer.

I guess I was to blame mostly for what happened with me and my ex this summer, but I have been to ashamed of myself to do anything about it. I met this boy, James, through a friend and we started to hang out. He was 17 when I was only 15, and he really liked me.

One day James and I were hanging out, and he had given me a few shots of Jamaican rum. At that point, I was drunk. As much as I hate to admit it, I can be really easy when I'm drunk. James began to rub my leg, up and down. I would normally find this okay, if I had been dating the guy for a while. But James and I had just started to date each other, and I didn't know anything about him.

He looked deep in my eyes, and asked me to kiss him. This I was fine with, I had kissed plenty of guys in the past. It was no different from any other kiss, except that he wouldn't stop rubbing my leg. He kept moving closer, and closer to my more private area. This really bothered me, as a boy had never tried to touch me there before. He stopped kissing me and whispered in my ear, "Have you ever given a blow job?" These words shocked me. I really didn't know James very well at all, and he was asking this of me? I shook my head to say no, and he responded by taking his pants and underwear off, and saying, "Don't you think it's time to try?" I was very afraid, and very drunk.

I was very afraid of what to say. I didn't want to say no, because then he would call me soft. But, I really didn't want to say yes. That would just make me feel dirty about myself. Eventually after a while of not saying anything, he grabbed the back of my head, and forced me to do the nasty. It was scary, and I didn't know what to do. Afterwards, I just really wanted to cry. He kept looking at me, and telling me how perfect I was. I wish I could have told him he was perfect, but he really wasn't.

I felt dirty, and he wasn't helping. He kept asking me to let him finger me, and I just didn't want to be touched. I told him not to, and whenever he tried to do anything, I would just say no. The next day I realised what had happened, and I called James to tell him I couldn't be in a relationship. Soon enough, everyone in school was calling me a slut. Turns out, he told people about what I did. He is the main reason that I just don't trust boys anymore.

The only pride I have is my virginity, it's the only pure thing about me. I smoke, drink, and do drugs. Being a virgin is my only claim to heaven, or else I know I'm bound for hell. Maybe, tonight will be different. I really want the chance to find a nice guy, and forget about that jerk.

Once the final school bell had rung, and it was 3:05, I walked to the parking lot. I saw Angela's car, and waited for her to take me to this party.

A/N: Well, there you go! Id love some reviews, any comments, suggestions, or anything would be nice.


	3. Be good or be good at it

A/N: Chapter 3. I would really like some reviews! Come on, please? WARNING: This chapter includes a lemon, AKA sex. Do not read if you're not into that.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters or themes, they belong to Stephanie Meyers.

Summary: A/U, Bella has had a hard life, and turned to drugs and alcohol at a young age. What happens when a sweet, but mysterious drug dealer sweeps her off her feet? - Deeper than it sounds.

Warning: This is a strictly M rated story, extreme drug descriptions and sexual scenes inside.

Angela drove at the speed of a snail, but it gave me enough time to change in the back of her car before we had to go to this party. I put on my favourite outfit, my black TNA pants, with my black white & gray spotted tank top. I wore this with a short gray cardigan, and my pink pumps. It was an outfit that made me feel sexy, even if it didn't show much skin. I didn't like the more revealing style, but Angela had that one down. She had on a short white pencil shirt, with a hot pink corset on top. She had her hair straightened to perfection, and 3 inched white wedges.

After about 10 minutes to driving, Angela finally found the house holding the party, and she parked a little down the street. As I got out of the car, I took a look at the house. It took me by surprise, I had never seen a more perfectly designed house. The house was huge, about three floors high, and it was completely white. Some walls were made of only windows, and you could see a much more decorated interior.

"So this is your buddy Edwards house? It seems very, proper." I said to Angela.

"If you think his house is proper, wait till you see his weed. He has the Kush, the top of the line bud. He's a dealer, but since it's his birthday, everyone will be ripped." She told me. I looked forward to what was soon to come, and for the first time today I was excited about going to this party.

We walked into the house, and could hear the familiar sound of Eminem and Lil Wayne's hit song, No love, playing from the basement. Angela, Jessica, and I walked down the steps, and saw about 30 people that none of us had met. The basement was huge, with a large screen TV in one corner and 3 couches in another room. We walked past a group of kids who looked about 19, sitting on chairs around a table. I looked a little closer and noticed that they were taking turns doing lines of coke. I was nervous to be here, everyone here looked older than us, and they were doing harder drugs.

We kept walking, and Angela finally found the parties host, Edward. She walked up to him, gave him a hug, wished him a happy birthday, and introduced Jessica to him. He was not what I was expecting. He was tall, with a mature face and bronze hair. He wore baggy clothing, and if I had to pick one word to label him as, I would say he was intimidating. Angela then turned to me,

"Edward, this is my best friend Bella. She really needs to get fucked up." Angela told him, joking around. Angela had known about what happened with James, and she was the only person I told. She knew how much I wanted to get over it, and she knew how much I loved getting stoned. Edward then looked at me and said,

"Well I can help you out there Bella. I'm Edward, it's nice to meet you." He said, in a voice as soft as velvet. He confused me, on the outside he was anything but soft. He looked strong, tough, and really good looking. But his voice, it was so beautiful. His voice, and eyes, were the most beautiful thing I had ever experienced. I felt just so, overwhelmed. I felt like I could trust him.

"Aha, well it's nice to meet you too. Do you have any rum?" I asked him. He looked at me and smiled, pulling out a bottle of Bacardi white rum from his jacket pocket. Angela looked at us and said,

"Well you're in good hands Bella, I'll be off now. Come on Jessica!" As she and Jessica walked away, to dance and hopefully find some weed.

Edward grabbed a shot glass from on his coffee table, and poured me a shot. I took it, swallowed it down quickly, and washed it away with a swig of ginger ale.

"So, how old are you? You smoke weed right?" Edward asked me, as he poured himself a shot of rum.

"I'm 16. And yeah, I smoke weed every day. It's more of a passion than a hobby to me, I really love the art form of smoking weed. I think it's really great." I said to him, I could tell that I was a little tipsy. I normally wouldn't give such a long answer. Edward took his shot, without chase, and his face didn't even twitch. It was like he was drinking water.

"I feel the same way, most people just abuse it. I like to really enjoy my weed, and the high is simply a reward for everything I do." He said to me. His face was amazing, his jaw was very masculine. His eyes were a soft golden brown color, and his lips were full and deep. I really wondered what it would feel like to kiss him.

"You deal, don't you?" I asked him, as I took my second shot. I felt the burn down my throat, and chased it away again with my ginger ale.

"Yeah, I get a lot of good business. So, I get the best piff I can, and move it around a few times. Have you ever dealt?" He asked me.

"Nope, nope, nope. I don't want to have to chase people around for money, and really I just don't think it would work out for me. Oh wow, I'm feeling a little tipsy," I told him, blushing a deep red color. He passed me a third shot, and I swallowed it down quickly. Edward was sitting right next to me, and all I could feel was incredibly attracted to him. He was hot, sexy, older, and he was a drug dealer. What else could I need in a guy?

"Haha, you must be a lightweight. That's really cute," He said, smiling at me. At this point in time, I felt very drunk. I couldn't really plan out my words in my head, and all I could say to him was,

"Yeah, I think your pretty cute yourself. And your voice is really pretty." He chuckled at me, and took a shot for himself. As he poured a next shot for me, I stared at his lips. They were so deep red, and I really wanted to taste them. It was a little irresistible. I took the shot he handed me, and all logic was out the window. I was most defiantly drunk, and I knew that I was going to do something stupid.

"Well thank you, your a very pretty girl Bella. Your name is very beautiful." He said to me, as he took another shot for himself. He was probably feeling tipsy, if I felt this drunk.

"Edward, do you maybe want to go talk in your room or something?" I asked him, I really wanted to be alone with him. I wanted the chance to kiss him, talk to him, and hear that beautiful voice he had. He nodded his head, and we both got up. He grabbed the bottle of rum, and led my upstairs to his bedroom.

We went up two flights of stairs, and I stumbled along the way. I even tripped on one step, and luckily Edward thought that was cute instead of clumsy. We walked down his upstairs hallway, into a large room with a king sized bed in the middle. Not much else was in his room, but he grabbed my hand and motioned for me to sit down on the bed next to him. I sat with him, and he laid is hand down on my thigh. We talked for a few more hours, and by the end of the night we were both very wasted. We talked about our families, and how we began smoking weed. We talked about our favourite weed, and what we prefer to smoke out of. We really got to know each other, and I felt safe with him.

He took the hand that was on my thigh, and began rubbing my leg. This brought back memories of James, but I put the thought out of my head. I didn't want to think of him when I was having such a nice time with Edward. He looked into my eyes, and the leant in to kiss me. I closed my eyes, and felt his soft, tender lips press slowly into mine.

He started to kiss me slowly, kissing softly down my neck, then back around my face returning to my lips. He then got a little more forceful, and began kissing me with meaning. His tongue pressed on my lips, and I opened my mouth welcoming him in. We explored each others mouths for a while, then he began tugging at my shirt. I gladly removed it, and he started kissing down my body. He stopped at the waist band of my TNA pants, and looked at me for permission to pull my pants off. I don't know if it was a drunken spur of the moment thing, or I actually felt trust towards him, but I gave him the head nod letting him continue.

He pulled down my pants, and then I was simply in a black lace bra and thong. It looked nice against my pale skin, and I was happy with my body. I was thin, pretty, and I had pretty large boobs. I was happy with myself. I saw Edward take off his shirt. He began kissing me again, and I felt his lips working their way toward my ear. He whispered to me,

"Are you a virgin?" In his beautiful voice. I nodded, and he whispered, "I won't hurt you, do you trust me?" I don't know why I felt like I really could trust him, after only knowing him for a few hours. But, I nodded again, and gave him permission to take my virginity. He tugged on his pants, and boxers, until he stood in front of me completely naked. His body was amazing, he was strong, with perfect skin.

I don't think I had ever been as drunk as this, and I knew I was doing something stupid, but it felt right. I knew I would regret it in the morning, but with Edward, it just felt like the right thing to do. I got into his bed, and we both shared control of the situation. He started by slowly swirling my clit with his fingers, then slowly fingering me with one finger. I could feel the wetness between my legs getting bigger and bigger, until I couldn't hold it anymore. I wanted more from him, I looked at him and said in a quiet voice, "Put it in me."

It was painful, and I let out a small scream as he first slid his member into my tight core for the first time. I could feel my body stretching and adjusting to the strange new concept, and soon it didn't hurt at all. It felt amazing, as he pulled in and out of my body, creating a bond and special connection between us. I didn't know if he felt it the way I did, but I knew I was on the top of the world. He sped up, and I felt like I couldn't handle the pleasure anymore. He started playing with my clit while he sped up, working in a rhythm as he toyed with my body. After a few minutes, I climaxed and shouted "Edward!" as loud as my voice would let me, and I felt him sperm shoot into my body.

He stopped, looked at me, and pulled out of my body. He kissed me deeply, and I felt complete. He held me, and I fell asleep in his arms. Forgetting any worry in the world.

A/N: Reviews? Please? Like, come on. It won't take that long.


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